Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Counsel Impressions in a nutshell...

Joe; Sorry to see you go. Although too often you've allowed things to go by that you knew you should have voted against, you've been great for Lancaster in that you have been consistent and fair.

Susan; Glad to see some initiative, I know it's cold when you're not under the warm cover of Carol's opinion but you'll be better off in the long run if you continue to vote for your district rather than hers.

Clyde; You have serious PR problems and should take more time to get to know your constituents, and not just the ones on your street!

Dick; I'm impressed with what you did on The Preserve. First time I've seen a counsel person actually take the lead in expressing their district's sentiments.

James; Nice guy but you've got to make better decisions in the future. It was way too easy for me to get to know you and way too easy for developers to blur the line between support and control. Fortunately you cut off their advances but I'm here to tell you, it was going to get worse!

Kimberly; Give me a break! Do you really thing people respect you because you add berly to your name? YOU WON YOUR LAST ELECTION BY A LITTLE OVER 100 VOTES AND YOU HAD NO, I REPEAT NO OPPONENT! Only 100 votes? You've got problems... I hear the fat lady singing on your seat.

Carol; You've had the most individual control over counsel agenda but according to many in Lancaster, you can't be trusted with the wheel when it comes to driving the city into the future. Some think there'll be Klan rallies at town square if you get in, others just think you'll build a moat around the historic district and attack anyone that tries to enter your kingdom. By the way I loved the cartoon of me in your last election ( standing on the city with the puppet strings...have it on my desk in a nice frame)

now for potentials...

Vic; gotta turn down the racial volume when you're running for office in Lancaster. The FACT of the matter is that the overwhelming majority of minorities living in Lancaster still aren't voting. The ones that are voting are...well... a little pigment challenged?!

Marcus Knight; I put this guy's last name because he's one to watch! The city loves him, the established voter base will follow him. The only problem is youth. Grow a beard and act old Marcus, you'll be the next mayor if some of the talk I've heard comes to pass.

Marvin Earl; Learn how to spell and keep your mouth shut. No...Not really, You don't have a snowball's chance in "L", I just put you here so I could show off how stupid you are...

Advise for free...

Margi, when Tommy comes by to get you caught up in another one of his "ideas", lock the door and pretend to be gone ( even if he can see you are there.)

Ellen; KNOW what's in the Educational Foundation's Accounts, after all, you ARE the treasurer not Larry.

Larry; There's no such thing as a purple alligator. Please refrain from wearing purple alligator shoes! It's just not right.

Lancaster Code Enforcement; Steve and Tommy have NO support for property clean up or maintenance so the trash is piling up. Need addresses? Start at Bear Creek and Blue Grove. I'm sure the kind folks down there can help you find it.

Marvin Taylor; Read your agreement to lease the Bear Creek property. You'll notice that there's plenty of latitude for the Leaser and none for you. Don't believe me? Have you noticed that wrecked boat Tommy left behind your house without so much as a phone call?

Linda ( At the Business Center ); Continue to pray and stay away from people that make empty promises. Find the dollar that Tommy has contributed toward the promotion of Lancaster youth services and I'll show you a dollar with attachments.

Nancy Moffet; Realize that your power comes from your ability to provide others with the correct information to effectively appeal to counsel. The general speak is that they ignore you when you speak no matter how right you are.

Oh yeah, For Heaven's sake if I hadn't mentioned it already, Larry please stop wearing 3/4 length suits and odd colored shoes. Is that how you dress when you're meeting other educators around the country? If you need him, I've got a guy... Al Gaunquinn. Privately tailored shirts, 1/8th inch reduced cuff on the watch wrist, 7 collar choices, and custom ties. Best money you'll ever spend. Natural leather shoes with a three layer tanning processes in natural hide colors...

1 comment:

Gadfly said...

This is so fricking funny.... and ACCURATE!